With everybody’s attentions split between a fifth London NW3 league fixture and the small matter of the Rugby World Cup Quarter Finals this was always going to be an odd game. A number of changes were made due to RWC attendance but the Hammers were still able to field a decent enough side. The opposition this week was St Albans, a team that had come down from London 2 North, so the Hammers expected a tough game. This was made tougher by the fact that Steuart ‘Spellcheck’ McIntyre who was due to start at 6 decided he was going to get some early mourning in for what was going to unfold in Marseille and decided to pull out.

Brushing such foregone conclusions to one side and concentrating on the job in hand the Hammers started very well. From the kick off Easy Jets Best Customer, James Leach, challenged well. Decent first phase possession was coming from both the scrum and the lineout from an improved forward performance and the three quarters were enjoying it. Callum ‘Hamstring’ Morris seemed to have covered himself in the same cologne that Ian Powell uses as no one went near him allowing the jinking Scotsman to carve through the opposition defense. Scott ‘Suicide Watch’ Foley doted down the first try with   ‘Hamstring’ scoring himself and then setting  up another one on a silver plate for Mark ‘Hamster’ Sweeting. Three tries to none up inside 15 minutes was a start that no-one could have expected.

At that point, the home side seemed to take their foot off the gas, much like in the previous home league game against Harpenden, letting the visitors into the match. The St Albans outside centre made full use of some disorganised defending to go over for a good score. Two more tries were scored in the first half, another from the visitors and a fourth from the Hammers. The fourth Hammers score was nice in two regards. Firstly it was little Tom ‘Boyband’ Hamnett’s first try for the first team and secondly it was a very well worked wraparound from the backs from a first phase play. The only slightly sour note was that as Boyband was dotting the ball down in the corner, Hamstring Morris was carrying on with the opposition winger, but by all accounts he did get his number so it wasn’t all wasted effort.

Not long into the second half Pete ‘Stalwart’ Lacey was forced off with a knee injury allowing Chris ‘Bloodbank’ Hird to enter the fray.

The fluency of the Hammers game seemed to desert them in the second half and they did not seem to be able to break the line as freely as in the first. However their defense was solid enough not to concede any points. Adam ‘Admin’ Wotton was introduced for Simon Ringshall mid way through. Admin countered like usual and during one of these kick returns he fed Ali ‘Little Fella’ Lines. The Little Fella beat two defenders and made yards up the left; however play was then brought back as Hamstring Morris was reacquainting himself with the St Albans winger with more handbags. Both of them and the other St Albans winger were all asked to take ten minutes on the side line.

The Hammers were able to grind out two further scores in the second half through Scott ‘Suicide Watch’ Foley and Barry ‘Sommelier’ OSullivan from a scrum against the head.

The overall impression of the game was of a job well done, six tries to two against decent opposition will always be a decent return. There is certainly a feeling that things are coming together in short patches and now it is case of trying to ensure that these patches are elongated and strung together better.

Team: Blyghton, Dray, Lacey, Leach, Nielson, Paddison, Millar, OSullivan, Lines, Morris, Hamnet, Sweeting, Ringshall, Short, Foley. Wotton, Hird.

Tries: Morris, Sweeting, Hamnet, Foley(2), OSullivan

Man of the Match: Hamstring Morris. Just hope he hasn’t run out of that cologne.

Tin Man: Alex ‘Cueball’ Nielson. ‘What was the score? Did England win today?’